I'm rsenting the fact that my hubby can go out when he pleases. I hate that he gets to go out, go to work, then comes home and he isn't really here. We havent had a decent conversation since before DS was born almost 3 wks ago. Today i wanted to go out and get our daughter a new bike for her birthday (i feel crappy that i havent even gotten her a b'day present yet, how bad a mum am i?), but our son woke up for a feed, so i asked hubby to take her out to pick her new bike. Well, that was a huge ask, he spent 2 hours piss-farting around saying he needed to clean out his car, then by the time he took her, my mum rocks up (again) so im then stuck home with her. They just got home, and he didnt even get her the bike!! He bought her a wii game! Im so mad and angry and in tears! I should have been able to get her the bike, but no, im stuck here at home, virtually a prisoner in my own house!! I know this will pass, but i really feel like im on my own. I have to ask him to hold his son so i can have a shower! I have to ask him to feed him so i can get dinner organised! FFS, why cant he see i need him to help me??!! I had to ask him to hug me the other night, and it was like a huge bother, and as soon as he does, his hands start to wander, seriously!!! I just needed to be held, not groped!
Sorry for the rant, just need somewhere to let it out, my neighbours will think im nuts if i open the backdoor and just screamed out!
Thanks in advance 😃
As i have mentioned before, i had GD with both pregnancies, so the risk of a "big baby" were there. Also, hubby's genes are more dominant than mine, he is a very tall man (6 ft 7in). So right from the get go, i knew my baby was going to be in the 90th percentile (Lani was, and she was born @ 34 wks!)
I had been sceduled to have an induction with Luca @ no later than 38 wks. However, my induction had been post-poned 4 times. The final straw was this past weekend. We were about to leave on Sunday morning to head to the hospital for my 6:30 am inductoin when the phone rang @ just after 5 am. I had been in the shower and hubby answered the phone. He came in to tell me "not happening again"! I burst into tears. Anyway, i went back to bed, woke up a few hrs later, rang the hospital and basically lost my s*** (in a teary way) and told them we would be there monday morning without fail as you cant keep cancelling me, im already 10 days over the original date!
So to cheer me up, hubby took us shopping. All day i was having mild to tolerable contractions, starting at 10-12 mins apart. So we went and had dinner with friends of ours and were home by 8pm, as we had to pick MIL up to stay at our place to take Lani to school.
As the night progressed, the contractions got stronger and closer, so at 1:30 am, we headed into hospital. We got there just before 2 am and went straight into a birthing suite. At 6 am, my waters were broken, and luckily, my labour started progressing on its own without needing the oxytocin drip.
By 10 am i had progressed to 6 cm, so i decided to have some gas, to help take the edge off the contractions. By 1pm, i was 8 cm, and was offered pethadine. All my contractions were at the front, no pressure on my back. By 3pm i was 9 cm, but my cervix was "stuck" behind his head and he was in a side on position (he literally had no more room to move). At this point i was beyond exhausted, so i begged for an epidural! The midwife kept telling me no, im at 9cm and about ready to deliver. At around 4, a surgeon came to give me an internal, and decided it was time to consider a c-section as bub and i were starting to get a bit distressed (a bit??!!) and it looked like he was stuck inside my pelvis. So i got an epidural by 5pm and was taken down to operating suite and preped for the c-section. At 6:21 pm, my big boy was born, but he didnt scream or make a sound. I couldnt see what was going on, but hubby did, and i could see tears in his eyes and his lips quivering. After what seemed like an eternity, Luca screamed! But his breathing wasnt the best, so as the pead's were tending to him, i was stitched up, taken to recovery and hubby and Luca went to special care. By 7:30, hubby walked into recovery with our Luca in his arms, snug as a bug!
However, Luca has developed an infection (only mild) and is now down in special care on antibiotics. Im here til Friday due to the c-section, and he is here til Saturday. Im hoping they let me stay an extra night so we can leave together.
Im about to express some BM and take it down to him. I missed him like crazy tonight, but the rest has done me wonders, im not in as much pain as i've had 7 hours sleep.
So moral of my story is, anything can happen, whether its you're first time or you've ridden this rodeo before. And also had i been induced at 38 wks, the risk of all that has happened may have been reduced, or not at all! Im just glad its over and my bubby is on the mend, but after 16 hrs of labour and a scary c-section i pray no one has to ever go through that!
Sorry for the long story, but it was a loooooong day!! End result is worth it. And that's it for us, kiddie-wise. I am truely blessed with my angels and couldnt ask for more. Once we were 3, now we are 4!